I Am Not Amused
by fueledbytwilight
Summary: The girls go to an amusement park. Alice keeps see 'imaginary boys.' Rose is really tired. And Bella loses her temper. One-shot


**A/N: **HI! This Bandgeek4life4281 and TheAppleofMyEyes. We've been working on this one-shot forever. We hope you like it. Most of this was written while we were very tired, that's not to say that it isn't good, it's just a warning.

The title is punny, you see, they're at an amusement park, and Bella is not amused. Hehehe.

Disclaimer: are stupid. (and we don't own anything except Zombie Assault Rampage)

**BPOV**

Normally the summer before college people go to cool places like Europe, but we aren't cool people, my friends and I just go to…Seattle. How exciting…I know. It wouldn't be so bad if we were just going to Seattle, but no, we're going to a theme park. Smithfield Family Fun Park to be exact. Who doesn't love long lines and crying children? But the roller coaster junkie in me is ok with it. As I was stretching from the car ride from Port Angeles I slathered on the globs of sunscreen, cause I don't do sun well.

Alice jumped out of the car, "Aren't you excited?" She asked me bouncing up and down.

"No." I said bluntly.

"Why?" she whined.

"I hate amusement parks."

"But you love roller coasters," she tried to reason.

"But I hate amusement parks."

By this time Rosalie had gotten out of the car, "Just deal with it, we're both stuck here because of that one." She said to me pointing at Alice. You see, Rose likes amusement parks, but loves sleep. Summer is the time when she gets caught up, sometimes you have to wake her up just to eat.

"Oooh, cute boys at eleven o'clock!" Alice said flirtatiously even though the guys were out of earshot.

"Where?" Rose asked looking up from where she was leaning against the car.

"Aw, you missed them." Alice said disappointedly.

"Rose, that was your two o'clock." I pointed out.

"Ugh, whatever, I'm still asleep." She said putting her head against the car again.

Once we were in the park Alice dragged us to the first roller coaster she saw, The Demon. After that first ride, Rose woke up considerably. She then joined in on the…fun.

After a few rides we decided to get some food. The food court was packed but we were finally able to find a table. As I sat down I saw a huge guy carrying a crap load of food, either he has a lot of friends or he hasn't eaten in a week. When Alice and Rose got back to the table with their food Alice's face lit up.

"There's one of the cute boys again!" She exclaimed.

"Where?" Rose and I asked at the same time.

"Aw damn, you guys missed him again." She pouted.

"Are you sure you're not just seeing things?" Rose questioned sardonically.

"I am not crazy." Alice said fiercely looking at Rose.

"Whatever, I'm going to go get my food now." I said getting up.

After waiting in line for five minutes I was finally next. I was lost in my thoughts until I heard a yell. "But mommy I want ice cream!"

The people in front of me were a mother and her young son and it looked as if he was getting on her last nerve. "You can't have a damn ice cream!" she shouted back at him.

"But mommy!" he screamed then started crying. I could feel my eye twitching in anger, I wanted to shout at them to shut the hell up.

Finally the mother caved in and got her son the 'damn ice cream.' Just as the boy turned to walk away he ran right into my leg ice cream first. I felt the cold ice cream drip down my leg causing me to explode, "Are you fucking serious?"

"Excuse me young lady, did you just swear in front of my son?" The women asked sharply.

"Don't acted so offended, you're the one that said damn and that's just a small step away from fuck, I mean damn is just a…a," I tried to think of the word, "a gate way swear word!" I exclaimed throwing my hands in the air. "I mean c'mon fuck isn't that bad, fuck the fucking fuckers bitch. Oh! I said bitch wanna lecture me on that now?" The women glared at me then stormed off, as I watched her and her son go I saw a guy with blonde hair behind me laughing. I turned to face him and yelled, "Fuck off!"

He looked at me calmly and nodded his head simply saying, "Ok."

My temper diffused and I realized how dramatic I was being and became immediately embarrassed. "I'm going to order my food now." I said pointing behind me and then quickly turned around. I was then face to face with the scared fifteen year old behind the cash register. I calmly stated I wanted a cheese burger and smiled the whole time they were preparing it. I politely said thank you and walked back to the table.

As arrived at the table the only thing Alice seemed to notice was the large stain on my shorts. "Bella, what happened?"

My previous outburst came back to me and I muttered, "I fucking hate amusement parks."

"Oh," They said together not asking any for details.

Half an hour later we were getting on another roller coaster. Alice and Rose ran to the front of the ride claiming the first two spots. Leaving me to wander along the coaster searching for a seat. When I finally found a seat I hopped in not noticing the person next to me. "Hello there," I said as I sat down.

"Hey," the guy next to me said.

I looked up and saw an incredibly hot guy.

"Hi," I said meekly.

"You already said that." He stated.

"Did I? I'm sorry."

"It's ok, people get flustered around me all the time." He said easily.

"I have no idea why." I said as I tried not to stare.

"Me neither, it's really hard to keep a conversation going when people can't form a coherent thought around me."

I stared at him trying to figure out if he was being serious or not, he was. I didn't know if he was incredibly cocky or completely oblivious. I didn't have a chance to respond because the ride started.

After twists, turns, and a few upside downs the ride was over. "Well, that was a fun ride wasn't it?" the guy asked.

I turned to face him while hoping my hair wasn't a complete rat's nest. "I hated it."

"Really?" He asked shocked.

"Well, I have to be in an amusement park to ride it." I explained.

"You don't like amusement parks?" He questioned.

"Not when you have to wait in line for a really long time behind a whiny little kid, has that ever happened to you?" I questioned angrily as I got out of my seat.

"No," he answered as we exited the ride. "But that happened to my friend and this girl in front of him completely lost it."

"Oh really?" I asked curiously.

"Yeah, she just started cussing and told my friend to fuck off…it was really awkward."

"What a bitch." I said shocked that someone would do that.

"Yeah, well see you later, or not, whatever." He said and walked away.

I was going to say bye, but he was already gone.

"Oh my gosh, that was one of the three guys!" Alice screamed suddenly from my side.

"That's cool." I said casually.

"What's his name? Did you get his number? Where does he live?" She asked excitedly.

"I'm not going to stalk him Alice! I don't even know his name."

"Why?" she complained.

"It didn't come up." I explained.

"Well you should learn how to flirt better." Alice said and stormed away.

"When have you ever actually flirted?" Rose came up asking.

"Well…there was that one time, at that one place, with that guy named Steve," I tried to recall.

"We don't know anyone named Steve." Rose said bluntly and walked in the same direction Alice went.

"What about a Bob?" I yelled after her. And she shook her head without looking back. A few people passing by turned and stared at me. "What?" I shouted. They looked away quickly and hurried on their way.

After a few hours of rides we decided to finish our amusement park adventure with the arcade. Once we all got inside we separated to play our favorite games. Rose went to go find the skee-ball. Alice headed towards Dance Dance Revolution. And I found my favorite game, "Zombie Assault Rampage!", best zombie shooting game ever.

Right as I was about to beat the high score I heard a loud, "Hey Bella!" for behind me. I turned around to see Rose with her arms full of tickets. When I turned back to the screen I was just in time to see a zombie begin to eat my brain.

"Damnit Rose!" I screamed.

"My bad." Rose said dryly.

"Your bad? Your bad? I was just about to beat the high score!" I shouted.

"Are you done?" Rose asked after a pause.

"Yeah." I said with a heavy sigh.

"Good, let's go find Alice now." Rose said as she walked away. I reluctantly followed.

We found Alice just as she was finishing her game of DDR. Alice hopped of the machine happily and said with a huge grin, "Look guys, I beat the high score!"

"That's cool." I said harshly. "I almost beat the high score too, but this one," I turned to glare at Rose, "Just had to get my attention and got my brains eaten!"

"What brains?" Rose replied quickly.

I glared at her for a few moments before saying, "You suck," and heading off towards the exit.

Alice skipped up to meet me saying, "Don't worry, you have brains. You got into college."

"Thanks Alice." I replied sarcastically. Then turned to face Rose and said, "See, Alice is nice to me, she's my favorite."

"But I don't force you to go shopping." Rose stated.

"Fair point." I agreed.

"That's not nice you guys, I just feel obligated to improve Bella's—Oh! Look the cute boys." Alice finished with a squeal.

Just as I looked to the direction Alice was facing I heard a voice say, "Hey! It's the girl that cussed me out."

My eyes landed on the guy who spoke, and I realized it was the blonde guy who I yelled at while getting food.

I was about to say something but was interrupted by a loud yell of "NO!"

I turned to see a large man on his knees in front of a claw machine.

"Ok, first of all, what's your name?" Alice asked with a flirty smile. "Second, what's his deal? And third, she cussed you out?" Alice asked the blonde guy while she pointed at the dude on his knees and me.

"My name's Jasper. And Emmett here is trying to win a stuffed animal, he's already spent twenty dollars."

As Jasper said that Emmett turned around—I recognized him as the man that had the crap load of food at lunch—and said meekly, "I just want the bear."

"Hey, the girl who doesn't like theme parks." Said the hot guy that I sat next to on the roller coaster as he joined the group.

"Hey Edward. Look, it's the girl I was telling you about, the one that cussed me out." Jasper greeted Edward.

"That was you?" Edward laughed, "You called yourself a bitch."

"Yeah…well…" I trailed off.

Rose who was watching silently finally said, "Ok, now I've got to hear this story."

Me and Jasper told them about the little kid and his ice cream. Then Jasper explained to us about how he told Edward and Emmett about the encounter. And then me and Edward shared our conversation from the roller coaster.

During the entire conversation Emmett was not paying attention. He was just staring at the bear he wanted.

Rose, who got sick of Emmett pouting, shoved him out of the way and put in a quarter. She skillfully got the bear he'd been looking at all day. As soon as she handed it to him he gave her a bear hug.

After we managed to pry Emmett off of Rose all six of us started chatting. We soon found out that we were all going to the University of Washington in the fall. And that the boys were from a small town named Forks and that they had known each other for a very long time.

Alice and Jasper immediately hit it off and soon exchanged numbers. Emmett begged Rose for her number and after a long time she finally gave it to him.

And as we were leaving and heading in different directions Rose thought it was a good idea to get Edward's attention then shout my number across the parking lot.

"Got it!" Edward yelled back as they reached their car.

**A/N:** Thanks for reading, hope you enjoyed. By the way…THIS WILL NEVER BE CONTINUED, SO DON'T ASK. You guys are awesome. Please review.


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